““The good book tells you to ‘love thy neighbor’, the bad book tells you how to.””
Prabhudoss Samuel
“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
George Carlin
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”
Drew Carey
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”
Jack Handey
“If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”
Earl Wilson
“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.”
Mae West
“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
Robin Williams
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