“It's only funny till someone gets hurt........then it's hilarious”
Tre Cool
“You're just as witty as you feel, just as witty as you feel inside.”
Rain Bojangles
“If I were to see the future and notice that I were alive at age of ninety, I would, at sixty, end it all before the possibility of adult diapers.”
Justin Murtey
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”
Jack Handey
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'”
Tommy Cooper
“Some people should come with a *brains not included* sticker”
Laurel Clive
“The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.”
Franklin P. Jones
