“If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter”
George Carlin
“Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love”
Woody Allen
“What I like about masturbation is that you don't have to talk afterwards.”
Milos Foreman
“The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to dress up for it”
Truman Capote
“I am going to my room to masturbate before I have a light lunch, if you would like to come and watch”
Salvador Dalí
“I never did like working out - it bears the same relationship to real sport as masturbation does to real sex”
David Lodge
“Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure.”
Thomas S. Szasz
