“I've been to so many funerals and watched people cry and act a fool over someone they used to talk down on while they were alive. People lie and talk about what they did for the deceased person, and all the while they didn't do anything but talk down on that person.”
Bettye Bullock
“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize I'm going to miss mine by just a few days”
Garrison Keillor
“The reason so many people turned up at his funeral is that they wanted to make sure he was dead.”
Samuel Goldwyn
“I'm more interested in the meaning of funerals and the mourning that people do. It's not a retail experience. It's an existential one.”
Thomas Lynch
“Always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't go to yours”
Yogi Berra
“Depressions may bring people closer to the church but so do funerals”
Clarence Darrow
“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Mark Twain
