(79 quotes found)
“Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right.”
Mitch Hedberg
“There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee...that says, fool me once, shame on...shame on you. Fool me...you can't get fooled again.”
George W. Bush
“Have you been to The Land of Happy,Where everyone's happy all day,Where they joke and they singOf the happiest things,And everything's jolly and gay?There's no one unhappy in Happy, There's laughter and smiles galore.I have been to The Land of Happy - What a bore!”
Shel Silverstein
“Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.”
George Bernard Shaw
“If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job”
Woody Allen
“One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world.”
Proverb
“The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.”
Mark Twain
“I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one”
“Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to”
Joe Gores
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