(4000 quotes found)
“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.”
Albert Einstein
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'”
Tommy Cooper
“An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.”
Agatha Christie
“Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.”
Oscar Wilde
“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"”
Winnie the Pooh
“Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.”
Dr. Laurence J. Peter
“I speak two languages, Body and English.”
Mae West
“Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself”
Mark Twain
“It's only funny till someone gets hurt........then it's hilarious”
Tre Cool
“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”
Groucho Marx
