(15264 quotes found)
“The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, HE was a genius.”
Sid Caesar
“If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.”
Dan Castellaneta
“I can speak for every guy in this room here tonight. Guys, if you could blow yourselves, ladies, you'd be in this room alone right now. Watching an empty stage.”
Bill Hicks
“When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?”
Stephen Wright
“Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on a date.”
Caroline Rhea
“If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.”
Jack Handy
“A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once”
Phyllis Diller
“I've gone for each type: the rough guy; the nerdy, sweet, lovable guy; and the slick guy. I don't really have a type. Men in general are a good thing.”
Jennifer Aniston
“There's a pizza place near where I live that sells only slices. In the back you can see a guy tossing a triangle in the air.”
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