(289 quotes found)
“"I came. They saw perfection. I conquered." (On arrogance)”
Jaf Liethers
“Curiosity killed the cat so the creator of the public school system and all the countries that support it did the most curious thing they forced people to learn things they did not want to know about to avoid being curious and still learn things”
armando rodriguez jr
“I keep hearing that Jesus Christ is coming, but nobody knows his tour dates”
Michael Lucas
“Utopians may idealize our agrarian roots, but only because no utopian actually has to do a farmers daily work. -Peter Farmer(no pun intended)”
Peter Farmer
“You can lead a horse to water, but a jackass will drive you to drink.”
Jeffrey C. Parkman
“Islam is NOT under attack; what is(rather under attack) is the near-dead consciense of intransigent satirists who aren't even devotees of the percieved 'opposing faith'.”
Joseph Annang Sowah
“The critics try to intellectualize my materiel. There's no satire involved. Satire is a concept that can only be understood by adults. My stuff is straight, for people of all ages.”
Andy Kaufman
“I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it -- I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes. Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know -- but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me. However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me. I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.”
Virginia Satir
“I think the reason that satire is on the rise is because the real news is so bad right now, ... I'd love it if we lived in a world where there was nothing to satire, but given this world, people need satire and comedy right now. ... [Humor] enables us to look at the horrible things going on and survive [them].”
Andy Borowitz
