(11404 quotes found)
“When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.”
Jack Handy
“In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can tell you, was an act that apparently had something to do with stamps.”
Dave Barry
“People react to fear, not love - they don't teach that in Sunday School, but it's true.”
Leonardo da Vinci
“I got attention by being funny at school, pretending to be retarded, and jumping around with a deformed hand.”
Leonardo DiCaprio
“As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am”
Erma Bombeck
“Right out of high school I never had the fear of getting beat, which is how most people lose.”
Dan Gable
“We all know here that the law is the most powerful of schools for the imagination. No poet ever interpreted nature as freely as a lawyer interprets the truth.”
Jean Giraudoux
“There are times when you just get down, you feel like nobody likes you. We're in high school forever. It's just what we do with it.”
J. Russell Lynes
“A fellow told me he was going to hang-glider school. He said, 'I've been going for three months.' I said, 'How many successful jumps do you need to make before you graduate?' He said, 'All of them.'”
Red Skelton
“High explosives and school don't mix”
Nancy Cartwright
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