Joy Maniscalco's site…
“I think nostalgia takes over when we think about people we once loved, and we tend to pick out all of the good parts. I could very easily sit here and say I still think about the one that got away, but the truth of the matter is that he didn't get away, he walked away...and I'm the girl he walked away from.”
Joy Maniscalco
“Some day you'll have someone worth holding on to... Someone who won't ever want to let you go...Someone who won't make you wonder if they were the one who got away, because that someone will be right there beside you, thanking the other someone who let you get away.”
“We have a choice...we can either rally up every miserable, single person in the city and have a giant pitty party, or we can put on our big-girl pants and celebrate singleness.”
“Why is it that people treat being SINGLE like it's the plague? I'm sorry, but it's not leprocy people! Where in the Old Testament does it say, 'boils, locusts, hail and being single'?”
“His heart isn't located in his scrotum, and if you subject yourself to bootie call status, expect to be treated like one”
“If everything you offer couldn't keep him, sadly your clam won't either. I know we'd all like to think we're sex goddesses that can lure any man under our spell and keep him there forever, but if love was based solely on sex there would be a lot more married hookers out there.”
“If a guy tells you he no longer wants to be with you, but he still calls at odd hours of the night to "hang out", don't take that as a sign that he's still interested in you. The only thing he's interested in, is what's in between your thighs.”
“If you know someone is going to punch you, should you close your eyes and pretend it's not going to happen? or should you be alert, eyes wide open, ready to defend yourself? I don't know about you, but I'd rather see the punch coming than get hit when I'm not looking. Will I be in pain either way? Yes, but I'll have the band aid ready.”
“If you yourself fail to recognize the truth, chances are no one else can make you see it either. You could have a giant, flashing sign in front of your face, but if you're not willing to see it, you'll look right past it and say, 'Oh, that must be for someone else'. Pump the breaks and stop lying to yourself.”
“Have you looked around lately? There are more muffin-top, camel-toe, wedgie-assed women on the street than hotdog stands! These women need to take a hard look in the mirror, and be honest with themselves. No one knows what size is labeled on the inside of your clothes. Please, for the love of God, buy the bigger size, because we're all a bit tired of looking at the outline of your labia!”
