Rodney Dangerfield , born Jacob Cohen, was an American comedian and actor, best known for the catchphrase "I don't get no respect" and his monologues on that theme.
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(60 quotes found)
“I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.”
“I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.”
“My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.”
“I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet”
“I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.”
“I was so poor growing up - if I wasn't a boy - I'd have had nothing to play with”
“I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.”
“I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up”
“My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.”
“girl phoned me the other day and said .... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.”
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