“Isn't it strange that I who have written only unpopular books should be such a popular fellow?”
“The pen was his voice and the page his tears, when he was done; they called it a classic”
“I had a dream last night, I was eating a ten pound marshmallow. I woke up this morning and the pillow was gone.”
“It's only funny till someone gets hurt........then it's hilarious”
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'”
“I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.”
“We live in the 21st century, the wisest generation yet to come, where you have the freedom to say anything you want, sue anyone and for anything, and wear a trash bag in style.”
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