“A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast”
“a bottle of aspirin with a bottle of vodka.”
“Aspirin use is much less frequent than we expected.”
“Look at a bottle of say, children's aspirin or your aspirin. Virtually anything has more child protective devices than the firearms in the home.”
“It's a headache and there's no aspirin in the cupboard, ... This one is not going to go away.”
“Aspirin is a drug that has been used for many years - it is well-understood, effective, inexpensive and widely available.”
“If you have a Headache, Do what it says on the Aspirin Bottle: Take one, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN...”
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