“If you have a Headache, Do what it says on the Aspirin Bottle: Take one, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN...”
“It's a headache and there's no aspirin in the cupboard, ... This one is not going to go away.”
“Look at a bottle of say, children's aspirin or your aspirin. Virtually anything has more child protective devices than the firearms in the home.”
“a bottle of aspirin with a bottle of vodka.”
“A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast”
“There's no quick fix - that's take two aspirin and call me in the morning,”
“Although research has shown the value of aspirin for people who have had a heart attack or stroke, aspirin regimen therapy is not appropriate for everyone.”
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