“Bob Hope was not a television pioneer. He didn't learn his lines. If you don't learn your lines, I don't take you seriously. We never had a (cue) card.”
“The true pioneer of civilization is not the newspaper, not religion, not the railroad--but whiskey!”
“People glow in the dark when they confuse shower gel with conditioner. It has nothing to do with love or spirit.”
“The pioneers of a warless world are the young men (and women) who refuse military service.”
“Everyone is slightly mad, when they are not they are either insane or in in love”
“I know I'm old, cause i want live as much as I have lived”
“Divorce is constitutional because some animals can never be domesticated.”
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