“Texans are proof that the world was populated by aliens”
“It's the one day of the year when everybody in the world can be a Texan and celebrate it. We have a unique state. We have a unique character.”
“You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans”
“Most Texans think Hanukkah is some sort of duck call.”
“I got married to a Texan lady. That more or less decided it,”
“[The native Texan got her breakout role in] Jerry Maguire ... You had me at hello.”
“I've always gotten along well with Texans. You've got to.”
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