“It's going to be touch-and-go for a lot of these puppies.”
“The best way to get a puppy is to beg for a baby brother - and they'll settle for a puppy every time.”
“If you are looking for a friendship that is forever loyal, always humble, never criticizing, and constantly listening.... than buy a dog.”
“A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates”
“All men are not slimy warthogs. Some men are silly giraffes, some woebegone puppies, some insecure frogs. But if one is not careful, those slimy warthogs can ruin it for all the others.”
“If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?”
“It's an outrageous smuggling method, to place packets of heroin in the bellies of live puppies.”
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