“So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'”
“Lorries overtaking eachother on the motorway is like fat people having sex, yeah they get there eventually but what's the point?”
“It's just a matter of our blokes lifting their game. They haven't been playing to their usual standard.”
“They've benchmarked the bloke in the overalls against Singapore and China, but they've benchmarked the blokes in the suits against New York and London.”
“I don't find offensive that I'm being labelled a babe by blokes. I'm absolutely flattered.”
“I'm a country redneck bloke”
“There's nothing wrong with being aggressive ? the bloke down the other end has a bat, some pads and a helmet.”
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