“Originally, I Was A Happy Drunk…”
“What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that makes you want to get drunk?”
“Being drunk is a good disguise. I drink so I can talk to assholes. This includes me.”
“He's happy with the form. He's sort of the 'big giant narcissist,' and he's also a big giant drunk.”
“Children and drunks always speak the truth.”
“Falling in love is like getting really drunk, it’s fun while your drunk until the next morning when you get a hangover and you tell yourself “Why did I do this. I will never drink again.””
“I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
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