“My first funeral job was mowing grass at funeral homes. ... I needed gas money. I got to drive around in a hearse. I wasn't afraid.”
“I drive a 1974 Cadillac hearse and it seemed liked the ultimate accessory for my car.”
“I've never seen a Brink's truck follow a hearse to the cemetery.”
“They don't put luggage racks on hearse”
“Why is there always a secret singing when a lawyer cashes in? Why does a hearse horse snicker hauling a lawyer away?”
“Everybody wants to use that hearse,”
“HEARSE, n. Death's baby-carriage.”
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