(4585 quotes found)
“I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.”
“Resistance is not futile.
It's Voltage divided by Current.”
“Water management in the United States of America is like a man trying to break out of the 'Friend's Zone'.”
“Siked, a poor misspelling of "psyched", was created by a nation of slack-ass, unintelligent teenagers...as were most of the words in the English language used today.”
“The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.”
“The human mind is a funny thing. One day it is your best friend and the next, it is your horrible adversary.”
“The human mind is a funny thing. One day it is your best friend and the next, it is your worst enemy.”
“We should love, not fall in love. Because everything that falls, gets broken.”
“Life's like a constipated dwarf; short and full of crap.”
“living in fear is not living... buy yourself a nice gun that'll blow peoples mind, literally.”
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