(4584 quotes found)
“Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”
“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”
“It's only funny till someone gets hurt........then it's hilarious”
“I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.”
“Some guy hit my fender and I said "be fruitful and multiply" but not in those words”
“It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.”
George F. Burns
“You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither”
“Me fail english? Thats unpossible.”
“Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God....I could be eating a slow learner.”
“If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.”
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