(4594 quotes found)
“We'll be working so hard with a lot of pressure and one funny bounce goes the wrong way. It just changes everything up, and it's hard to bounce back.”
“Why is a woman like a hurricane? Because when she comes, she is wet and wild and when she leaves she takes your house and your car”
“He had the sort of face that makes you realize God does have a sense of humor.”
“The similarity between men and parking spaces is striking. The good ones are taken and the free ones are too small.”
“There is a special hell for CEO's, It’s air-conditioned.”
“How boys propose? They go down on one knee, pull out a ring, and say, I love you. Will you marry me? How girls propose: I'm pregnant'”
“Santa: My wife treats me like a dog! Psychologist: Does she abuse, hit or starve you? Santa: No it's a worse! She wants me to be faithful.”
“she would rather cuddle then have sex. If you are good with grammar you will get it”
“you are only as stupid as the person you are talking to thinks you are.”
“people that see ufos aren't weird they are just stupid. the smart ones are the ones that get on em and get the hell out of here.”
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